the-cyclopes-are-watching

helvetebrann:

Teaching Consent to Small Children

afrafemme:

A friend and I were out with our kids when another family’s two-year-old came up. She began hugging my friend’s 18-month-old, following her around and smiling at her. My friend’s little girl looked like she wasn’t so sure she liked this, and at that moment the other little girl’s mom came up and got down on her little girl’s level to talk to her.

“Honey, can you listen to me for a moment? I’m glad you’ve found a new friend, but you need to make sure to look at her face to see if she likes it when you hug her. And if she doesn’t like it, you need to give her space. Okay?”

Two years old, and already her mother was teaching her about consent.

My daughter Sally likes to color on herself with markers. I tell her it’s her body, so it’s her choice. Sometimes she writes her name, sometimes she draws flowers or patterns. The other day I heard her talking to her brother, a marker in her hand.

“Bobby, do you mind if I color on your leg?”

Bobby smiled and moved himself closer to his sister. She began drawing a pattern on his leg with a marker while he watched, fascinated. Later, she began coloring on the sole of his foot. After each stoke, he pulled his foot back, laughing. I looked over to see what was causing the commotion, and Sally turned to me.

“He doesn’t mind if I do this,” she explained, “he is only moving his foot because it tickles. He thinks its funny.” And she was right. Already Bobby had extended his foot to her again, smiling as he did so.

What I find really fascinating about these two anecdotes is that they both deal with the consent of children not yet old enough to communicate verbally. In both stories, the older child must read the consent of the younger child through nonverbal cues. And even then, consent is not this ambiguous thing that is difficult to understand.

Teaching consent is ongoing, but it starts when children are very young. It involves both teaching children to pay attention to and respect others’ consent (or lack thereof) and teaching children that they should expect their own bodies and their own space to be respected—even by their parents and other relatives.

And if children of two or four can be expected to read the nonverbal cues and expressions of children not yet old enough to talk in order to assess whether there is consent, what excuse do full grown adults have?

sharkvom

cacen:

necromancer:

What I imagine happens when people see something on their dash that makes them comment “SCREAMING OMFGFG D SJGHIJEBFKKJDVJKN”

now let me tell you something you might not know: this fucking piece of shit video changed my life

"but it’s just some guy screaming" well sit down son you’re in for a rollercoaster of a story

so a year ago or so I was scrolling along my dashboard when I saw klefable had reblogged this video of some random guy and had tagged it something like ‘lol he’s cute’ and I was like OH I’LL BE THE JUDGE OF THAT so I watched this fucking video of some shitty pissing English boy screaming in his living room and it had like ten thousand notes and that was a pretty big deal back then

I thought to myself ‘you know what fuck it I’m gonna follow this piece of shit for no fucking reason whatsoever’ so I clicked follow and for some ungodly reason he followed back which was unexpected because he was some Tumblr famous arsedouche and you know what I fucking hated him because he was English and he hated me back because I’m Welsh but we somehow formed this twisted friendship over the internet where we’d do nothing but fucking send hate messages to each other because that’s what Welsh and English people do

how on earth we fell in love and celebrated our one year anniversary two weeks ago is a fucking mystery to me

image

happy fucking anniversary you screaming English pisslord